“Many local dungeons have beginner classes where you can practice things like rope tying and spanking,” says Skyler. Go to a sex dungeon.īefore you freak out, BDSM dungeons can actually be a great place to observe kinky sex from the sidelines-the experts really recommend them. “Most sexuality stores sell beginner packages that also include things like a feather on a stick for sensation play or a soft flogger for spanking,” she says. You can also pick up a beginner's kink kit that includes things like blindfolds and fuzzy handcuffs, says Skyler. Grab a blindfold.Ģ5 Kinky Sex Positions Even Shy Women Should Try Instead, cue up The Secretary on Netflix, advises Aaron. “There are a lot of really bad and unsafe examples of BDSM in porn,” she explains.įor the record, the experts also don’t recommend 50 Shades of Grey, since not everyone in the kink community agrees with the way BDSM is portrayed in the film.
If you’re not quite ready to dive in, watching a movie with an element of kink can be a great place to get some ideas, according to the experts (not to mention, a perfect way to heat up movie night). Keep exploring until you find what feels good for you.” 1. “Enjoy it, get acclimated, and then take a few more baby steps. "Having a game plan and setting up a safe word is important,” she says.įrom there,“take baby steps,” says Skyler. The biggest rule: If you and your partner are both interested in kinky sex, have an open conversation about what it is about kink that's a turn-on, and what you're comfortable trying, says Jenni Skyler, Ph.D., a certified sex therapist and sexologist, and director of The Intimacy Institute in Colorado.
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